THIS *gestures wildly at everything* is all TOO MUCH
What to do when you feel like curling up and crying
Guys.
What the fuck.
Everything feels so bad right now. 😩
I wake up every morning, drink my coffee, open my phone, and every other headline is about multiple global crises. I can't stop thinking about children in Gaza. Book bans, trans rights being stripped away, mass deportations - I can't stop thinking about the children of immigrant parents being taken away. Global rise in authoritarianism, climate disasters - I can’t stop thinking about the little girls at the camp in Texas. The mental health crisis especially among teens, rising maternal mortality rates, unaffordable housing, ongoing threats to voting rights…
I mean, seriously. What the fuck.
I feel trapped. I KNOW the algorithm feeds off my outrage and fury and despair, and the relentless barrage of negative news only drives more dollars into the pockets of billionaires. So I will deliberately put my phone down and go outside to take deep breaths and touch grass…and then I feel guilty for not witnessing it all.
But I also know that this guilt itself is part of how the system keeps us small and overwhelmed.
We are not meant to live like this, it is too much to see the pain of the entire world on a magic mirror in the palm of our hands. I feel this bone-deep exhaustion and pain in my heart. I feel shredded and raw and tender.
And I say this while holding the tension that while everything feels really bad and scary, it's also probably the best time in the history of Homo Sapiens to be alive. Truly, I would rather be alive now than at pretty much any point in human history.
But I'm not going to let that stop me from wanting even more. I want it to be even better. I want children to be safe and fed and healthy. I want moms to be able to take their kids to a clean park, and go to a job where they feel valued and proud of their work. I want to feel safe at a stop light when a giant truck covered in American flag stickers pulls up next to me.
How do we get there? I started writing Rebel Leaders to gather and clarify my thoughts about leadership development for women, LGBTQ+, and other marginalized voices. And sometimes I sit down to write an essay about some facet of leadership and it feels so…selfish.
Like, who am I to talk about leadership when children are dying? Who fucking cares?? Maybe this is not the time to be writing about leadership for women, or launching a coaching business, or feeling like I’m doing some kind of self-promotion.
Maybe This IS the Time
But when I can gather myself off the couch and roll up my sleeves, I remember that it is not an accident that got us here.
Everything that feels bad and heavy and scary and shitty in the world is avoidable. It is the result of decades, and centuries, and probably millennia, of traditional leadership that focused on concentrating wealth and power into the hands of a few at the top at the expense of many at the bottom.
We have lived in a world that for too long has created hierarchies of domination. And now it's time for something different.
Thinking of it that way gives me enough anger and energy to sit down and write this post. Writing Rebel Leaders isn’t me feeling separate from the crises in the world; it’s medicine for it. This is something I can do. This is something I can write about, and coach for, and help in some way.
The world doesn’t need more people stepping up to take charge in the old ways. We need people who lead from love, justice, maternal wisdom, and spiritual grounding. Right??
(Even just writing that sentence makes me feel a little better.)
What We Actually Need Right Now
We need leaders who feel DEEPLY and don’t disconnect from their humanity. And I needed to remind myself today that’s what this Substack is about - it’s about and for the people who are feeling raw and shredded and want to DO something but don’t know what.
I want to help inspire those people that they are ACTUALLY the ones who should be in charge, even in their own little corner of the universe. The mom setting boundaries at the dinner table. The teacher quietly protecting trans kids. The neighbor organizing mutual aid. The person choosing rest as resistance.
We need leadership that’s rooted in healing, not harm. What we need right now are people who care for other people, and they also know that they need to care for themselves.
Practical Wisdom for the Overwhelm
So here is a little practical advice to help you when you feel like curling up and crying (that I will undoubtedly need to refer to again and again):
Find your favorite 30 second reset - drinking a glass of water and looking out the window is mine
It's okay to feel the weight and fear AND still move forward
Small acts of rebellion matter (rest, boundaries, joy, truth-telling)
You don't have to save everyone to make a difference
Sometimes the most radical thing is to keep going with love
I’ve been researching the idea of “purpose" lately, and I have a little series planned to write about it, but I needed to say all this first. We grow through the challenges in our lives, and I know that our country and our world have been through major challenges, and this current moment definitely feels like one.
It’s a good reminder for myself that this work matters MORE during dark times, not less.
How are you holding up? What practical wisdom would you share?