Leaders Lead, In Any Room They're In
Why leadership is a practice, not a position
Who remembers group projects in school? The nervousness when your teacher assigned you to work with kids you didn’t know well, or the ones you knew all TOO well.
Honestly, I kind of miss group projects in school. I CRUSHED group projects. I was always the one who spoke up first to get us started. No one needed to appoint me, and I didn’t wait to be chosen - I just couldn’t stand the awkward silence of five people staring at each other, waiting for someone else to speak up. But I genuinely liked figuring out what needed to get done, breaking the work into pieces, and finding ways everyone could contribute. It felt good to be building something together, something bigger than any of us could do on our own.
Of course, it was annoying when someone didn’t step up. And yeah, sometimes I ended up doing more than my fair share, because let’s be honest, “the good girl” often gets saddled with both initiative and cleanup duty. But even then, I understood something about leadership: it wasn’t about being the boss. It was about making sure we got somewhere together. I didn’t need permission to lead. I just got us started.
Leadership has too often been positioned as something that’s bestowed upon people, symbolized by a fancy title, a corner office, a pay raise, and a (usually) male voice booming with authority. But rebel leaders lead wherever they are. They know that it isn’t about power or domination, it’s about a shared responsibility to get shit done.
Being a leader isn’t waiting for someone to ask you to participate; it’s raising your hand before anyone else even realizes there’s a problem. You don’t need a title to lead, and you don’t need someone to give you permission to take charge. That’s what this week’s post is all about - how to stop thinking of leadership as a position and start thinking of it as a practice.
Leadership Is a Practice, Not a Position
The dominant myth tells us that leaders are the ones who give orders from the top of the hierarchy. They’ve been put in that position by someone else with authority, or a board of someones, and their job is to tell other people what to do. But I want to live in a world where leadership is actually just regular people stepping up because it aligns with their values and serves the greater good. People who know that leadership is a verb, not a noun.
Leadership as a practice means you’re not just the person who points out the problem, you’re also willing to actively help solve it. This doesn’t mean stay silent about injustice or discomfort, of course you can (and should) speak up or object. But when you’re ready to call out what’s wrong, go a little further and also be ready to ask “what can we do differently?” it means you offer an idea, even if it’s imperfect. This requires you to be a little brave, right? Rebel leadership requires a bit of courage. Not loud or dramatic courage, quiet everyday courage that means you’re willing to risk embarrassment, discomfort, or failure when you step up to offer solutions.
Leadership as a practice also means you are prepared to lead without any applause, appreciation, gratitude, or even acknowledgement. No spotlight, no participation trophy, maybe not even a thank you. So many leaders, especially women, BIPOC, queer folks, show up every day in powerful ways without recognition. They organize, care, feed, comfort, and advocate, and they rarely get the credit.
The invisible labor of motherhood, caregiving, and community-building that millions of women do each day is leadership. When you prep and serve healthy meals without being asked, or organize the park playdate that gives you and the other moms a much-needed social hour, or when you notice your kid needs new shoes and buy them before anyone even notices…they might not call you a leader, but we will. That quiet leadership is just as necessary as the loudest voice in any boardroom.
Rebel Leadership Is Everyday Resistance
Not only are rebel leaders taking action in whatever room they’re in, they’re also intentionally pushing back against the systems that seek to dominate those rooms in the first place. Systems like white supremacy, patriarchy, ableism, capitalism, and heteronormativity. Resistance doesn’t always mean protest signs and mic drops (although those matter too!) More often it looks like the quiet, everyday choice to lead differently from the status quo.
Everyday resistance means choosing collaboration over competition in an office that rewards individualism. It means making space for someone who’s been silenced, especially when no one else notices. It’s offering empathy when the norm is urgency, or questioning deadlines that make everyone panic.
Leadership doesn’t have to be groundbreaking or grand, and you don’t need someone else to give you permission either. It can look like:
Starting the group text to check in on coworkers after a difficult meeting
Offering to schedule the next meeting, then actually doing it
Being the one who says, “Hey, that joke wasn’t funny”
Making space in a conversation for someone who’s been talked over
Gathering neighbors for a casual dinner to build connection in your community
Rewriting a policy or process to make it more inclusive, even if it’s not “your job”
Rebel leadership resists domination by refusing to replicate it, even when it would be easier or more rewarded to go along. This kind of leadership might feel risky or exhausting. But these are the quiet, everyday, radical acts that build connection and trust, and this is what shifts culture.
Lead Like the Girl in the Group Project
Take a look around and think about where you are already leading in your life at work, at home, and in the world? What’s one place in life where you could take initiative this week? Do you act like a leader already or are you waiting for someone to give you permission? Does it feel like stepping up comes with risks I haven’t called out here? I’d love to hear your stories of the times you were a leader without being asked first!